The New York Diary - My week in NYC, Day 3 & 4: Wholefoods Robbery, Pendulum mosh pits and Central Park
Clarins Beauty Discovery Evening @ Selfridges Birmingham

The New York Diary - My week in NYC, Night 4 - The Bonus Story of the Bouncer

Hi guys! It's Friday and I finally have some time to continue with the gossip of New York. Gosh New York, I can still hardly believe that I went there! As the happenings become memories and life rolls along, I already feel a world away, and almost one step forward to my next trip!

So in my last post, I left you during the day-after-the-night-before of a Pendulum mosh pit in Brooklyn and chatting over beers until the early morning in a scene that would have been at home in an episode of Girls. We had made the clever decision to just ride the open top bus the next day but that did not satisfy enough for a day in NYC, so just my one friend and I decided we couldn't bear wasting any second and to hit the Manhattan night air for a fourth night running. By now we had numerous guys from previous night offering to hang out again, and while their advances were mostly of the friendly nature, we knew a brand new night would bring brand new people. And we were not wrong! This post is very much a *bonus round* as it's simply a funny story, but I have no pictures to accompany this as I didn't even take my phone out at night.

I had a heavenly power nap before coaxing myself to hop in that shower and get my butt into action. That night was when I recorded my outfit in my vlog and I really have to stress that I didn't vlog or photograph everything we did, so I'm telling you here in these posts. It was coupled with the fact that my main prerogative was to enjoy every moment rather than document every moment, and also the friends I was with are, like myself, so not about that social media humble brag life. We had a conversation that went something like 'Hmm we really should post something on Facebook shouldn't we?' 'I'm not putting anything on mine' 'Me neither' 'OK well I'll post a picture but I'm not putting a status or description or anything' and that's how it stayed! I posted two pictures I think and even then I felt the shame. So you won't see many selfies here or outfit photos as we just didn't have chance to stop!

I have digressed but I shall continue with the night of Monday, and I spent a good fifteen minutes consulting our list of 100 bars and clubs to figure out which we definitely wanted to go to and which were open on Mondays and close to each other. I need some sort of orienteering award after this because it is way more difficult than it might seem! We decided to hop across to a mysterious rooftop bar that was opposite out hotel room, and then onto Up and Down as recommended by Maya and possibly a club called Avenue which apparently had an amazing Monday night on. The ground floor of the elusive rooftop bar, which had seemed amazingly full every night when we saw it from our hotel, was rather like a dungeon, and we followed the bouncer's instructions of 'turn left, right, then left' down the dingy corridors and to a lift. Another gal joined us and she was wearing what I can only described as a plunge, lycra printed hot-pant jumpsuit with thigh high boots - amazing. She basically looked like Beyoncé about to go on stage and had that vibe of being a girl totally dressed up but you've not linked up with your friends yet, so you feel most awkward inside but are trying to channel your most natural vibes. I, in contrast was wearing a midi pencil skirt and polo neck top a la Kim K but felt like yes, we had come to an awesome club.

When the lift arrived to the roof, it was clear this was a hip hop/trap night as the room was full of grinding couples, groups of girls dressed in the most skin tight, mega plunge dresses that I've only ever seen on Instagram pages with 300k followers, and guys in sunglasses. We grabbed a drink and stood outside to look over the rooftops. Times Square is so brightly lit that it actually looked like daylight! It was bizarre! This music was so up my street though and of course it was not long before some guys approached us who described themselves as a model/blogger/stylist/creative duo who had just rode their bikes over from Brooklyn. One was smartly dressed with waist length dreadlocks, and the other had a man bun, baggy hippy pants, and could do an awesome British accent. They said Avenue was a great party but Up and Down sounded like an awesome place, so we said maybe see them later and hopped in a cab. We got a little lost on the way and the cab actually drove past Avenue, so I hopped out and asked one of the bouncers near the edge of the street for directions, which he gave me with no fuss. BIG MISTAKE. Read on.

The bouncer at Up and Down first asked if we were on a guest list but it looked like the club wasn't even open as there was no one outside, so he nodded for us to go in and we headed through the dark door and downstairs. Monday definitely wasn't the main night as it was more of a casual vibe with low tables and plush sofas occupied by cool kids, and so we had one drink and a gossip before thinking Avenue was the way to go. Back in a cab, we pulled up to a very busy crowd now surrounding the square section of barriers outside Avenue and saw our model friends from earlier! Sadly they seemed to be having trouble getting in as one of the guys was dressed so casually in his baggy pants, and there didn't really seem to be any gap to go towards the club door anyway; just barriers and crowds of very tall, slim people looking very prestige. One burly bouncer told me to 'wait there' and we noticed a very small, tanned, wrinkled older bouncer in an immaculate suit but wearing the type of gloves you might wear while beating someone up (?!), and he was possibly the scariest person I've ever seen. I watched as groups of people joined the crowd, then seemed to be recognised by the bouncers and have the barrier pulled aside for them. Some people stood near the front for a moment before getting the attention of the scary dude and somehow saying some magical words to enter. I asked the nearby less-scary bouncer why we were waiting and he said 'be patient', ignoring my question. And it was about ten minutes before I realised something was up. We were not getting into this club.

We spoke to some guys next to us who had just arrived and were male models (male. models. YES) and they stood almost in silence as the bouncer sized them up for about five minutes, before somehow passing the test and being let in. By now it was around 2am and I was not happy about the wasted time. We could have gone somewhere else! Why wasn't he letting us in? Apart from implying something gross, the more friendly bouncer said a few times 'just a few minutes' and did his best not to look anywhere in my direction, before finally, finally turning to the scary, scary man and nodding to us. The miniature man I swear didn't not even grace us with his gaze as he shook his head and turned to other commotion. Argh! It was not like me to give up on a situation but I just could not figure out how to get into this club. The people going in were so random - they just seemed to know the bouncer. Was there a secret password? Open sesame?! We were talking to the friends from earlier who couldn't get in because of his trousers and one of the male models came out from the club too as he had tried to get us on the list (yes - a male model. His jaw is still in my dreams). We asked him what was up and he said apologetically "OK girls... it's because.... you're not tall enough." and looked at us pityingly.

Not tall enough. Not tall enough?! Amazing! I'm 5'5 and my friend is about the same and we were in heels, but he explained that the night was a party of models and celebrities, and we had rocked up after 1am thinking we could stroll in, without knowing anyone's name or being on the guest list, and looking like tourists rather than effortless models. We were so obviously nobodies! They didn't want their club to be a tourist playground; it had to be the most exclusive crowd around. Ah! So that made sense and we realised we had got very lucky with the clubs we had been to so far. And it was even more apparent when, five minutes later, Wesley Snipes walked out of the club and then a guy from Empire. Woah. And I also just Googled the club and that scary bouncer is actually this guy. WOAH. We asked ourselves who did we think we were when we assumed we could just walk into the most exclusive clubs in the most exclusive city in the world. We grabbed pizza slices and pondered our new found knowledge, before heading off and buying makeup in the 24hr CVS on Times Square at 2an. Not at all a bad end to a night that had no expectations for, but definitely a night not to forget! So how did our other night fare when we did manage to get into what is known as THE most exclusive club in NYC? Stay tuned!

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